Erk..

I just did something that is quite unexplainable.

Although people might say I'm officially nuts, and it's true, I have no concrete explanation for it -but I think it's perfectly fine. And I won't even bother with a justification.

You know how people spend hundreds and thousands on a hobby they love and people around them shake their head and go `tsk, tsk, I can't believe she spent that much on that' and that person goes ahead and does it anyway? Well, this is like that for me.

I would never consider buying a RM5,000 handbag.. but for this hobby of mine, I've spent close to it already.

Erk.. :-P

Can you guess what it is?

Pumpin' up a storm

EBM Stock to date. I've been pumping for 3 months now.

February. I gotta start using these by 1st May otherwise they'll expire.

Got quite a bit for March.

April - just a few days, lots more coming in, insyaallah!

Each pack is 7oz, so here, there are about 60 packs. So I've got 420 oz in here.

All for.. her.

Motherhood is..

.. taking short naps at night instead of a long, 8 hour slumber.. the number of times you wake up and go back to sleep to attend to your little one no longer qualifies the activity as sleep..

*sigh*

penatla

My Ameda Lactaline

It's here! My new pump is here!

I'm such a freak for pumps. I have 3 now, my Mamivac Lactive, my Mamivac Manual and my latest addition to the family, my Ameda Lactaline. Hehe.. not to mention those that I've given away or sold to friends and family.

The reason for this new pump is not very strong really.. hehe.. I just wanted to have a second pump I can carry around and not over-exhaust my current one... can ah? Yeah that's how much I love my pumps. Especially now since my baby is having issues drinking directly :-( (will write about that later) I fear I might need to pump more often than I already do now.

Here it is in all its glory.

I chose this pump because:

a. It has battery function AND electricity abled.

b. It's a closed system pump, which means no contamination of milk, unlike some other famous pumps.

c. It's affordable, about RM800.

d. It's lightweight, only about half a kg so pop it goes in my handbag.

e. It doesn't come with all the accesories which I already have.

Hmm.. what else.. Oklah for now, will update if I have more to say on this.

My Mamivac Lactive

I've been wanting to introduce my pump to the world and today is as good a day as any! (^_^) With all the hype surrounding Medela's latest and super slim pump, the Freestyle (which I had initially wanted as well, huhu..) I found this pump - that was said to be just as good, if not better.

Medela Freestyle is one expensive pump, retailing at about RM1700 and this one, from Germany, is slightly less, for RM1300. Medela has one disadvantage that I don't like - the fact that milk (or drops of moisture from the milk) can get into the tubes and stay there. It's sounds pretty gross to me and so this pump came at a perfect time. It has a closed system, which in no way at all, milk can escape to the tubes.. which means, it's maintenance-free.

And after using it, I am a big fan. It's a perfect little pump, responsible for my generous output of milk. This has been my pump for the past 3 months. I bought it especially upon giving birth to my 3rd daughter. Here it is, with much pleasure..the one and only Mamivac Lactive.. taa daa...



I pump at my workstation.. at home! hehe.. so I double pump while working, handsfree.. tak terasa time flies and bottle dah penuh (^_^)

side view
the pump comes with this super cute red bag



small and compact, really sturdy design and amazing technology

a regular pumping session.. about 5.5oz.. not phenomenal, but not too shabby either (^_^)



the manual version - also equally good

FYI, this is my 5th pump and by far the best - my previous pumps were pureen electric (big mistake, total crap) avent isis, medela harmony (both good but i can't la, manual pumps, penat..) , medela mini electric (too noisy and single pump) and spectra 3 (a very good basic double pump too). I'm thinking of getting the Ameda Lactaline too for its battery operation-ness, for as wonderful as this Mamivac pump is, it needs electricity to run. That's the only drawback.

Getting a good breastpump is the make or break factor in making your breastfeeding journey works, seriously. Pay a little more for your pump but you will be rewarded with insyaallah, a more efficient way of removing milk from your breasts and generating more output, giving you satisfaction and that peace of mind we crave when feeding our little ones while we're at work.. good luck mums!

Sad day

I put this up on Facebook and thought some people might be uncomfortable with it, so here it is now. It's about the milk in the freezer that I had to throw away due to power failure. One of the things I will never ever forget in my entire life.

One of the saddest days of my life - had to throw away 13 bottles of expressed breastmilk due to electricity failure.. tears flowed freely as precious milk was poured away :'-(


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Added January 24 · Comment ·LikeUnlike

Ilya Yasnorizar
dugaan selalunya kak la akn mendpt yg lebih baik. its mean u akn dpt produce more what u already have b4.....
January 25 at 9:11am ·

Maizura Abas
You are doing so well, girl! You've just had your baby and already you have managed to store 13 bottles of milk! Don't worry, Insya Allah, HE will allow you to provide for baby Syasya!
January 25 at 11:52am ·

Shazreen Zakaria
Hang in there dear...benda baik memang byk dugaan...
January 25 at 11:57am ·

Nik Rahila Wan Ibrahim
Iza, Mai & Shaz - thank you dears, I needed that. It was heartbreaking, to say the least! But redha je lah, and keep going. Adalah hikmah disebaliknya!
January 25 at 2:39pm ·

Afiza Aksan
Sorry to hear that Nik...tak pe lah insyallah ada kebaikannya...n there wud be abundant for the lil one!!
January 25 at 3:07pm ·

Mariny Lubna Mohamed Arif
ala siannya ila! (donno what else to say...)
January 25 at 4:15pm ·

Nik Rahila Wan Ibrahim
kak fifi & nina - thanks, i just needed the support, really! this is nothing we can control, and so kena just terima je & stay strong, but your kind words really helped :-)
January 25 at 7:00pm ·

Mariny Lubna Mohamed Arif
had a great time at FRIM. really inspired by this one mommy who only manage to get the baby to latch on the 38th day after birth... but insisted to give the baby the best!
January 25 at 7:07pm ·

Puteri Isyatur Radhiyah
Sad! I know the feeling. I had to throw 6 bottles full when I attended a course in Melaka.
January 25 at 7:40pm ·

Nik Rahila Wan Ibrahim
my goodness, nina, 38th day?? wow, any other mum would give up days before.. hats off to her! puteq, isn't it just painful? i mean, excruciating!
January 25 at 7:50pm ·

Mariny Lubna Mohamed Arif
i did asked her.. what made her want to continue.. she simply said, she knows it's d best.. btw, it was her inverted nipples that caused d delay.. she cried when the baby first latched..[tangkap sayu dgaq cite cam ni sob sob]
January 25 at 8:24pm ·

Shazreen Zakaria
can imagine the pain she went thru...mine cracked each time masa dalam pantang..rasa nak campak je baby kalau baru nak latch...sakit sampai ke hujung kaki n otak!i pernah masa nak mandi, removed my bra and the skin terpeel off terlekat kat bra tuh...nak nangis tapi Alhamdulillah for full support from hubby..managed to bf all babies tho tak sampai 2 years tapi at least 6 months tu fully bf..now with wafeeq, the longest, hopefully sampai la 2 years..InsyaAllah..
January 26 at 3:33pm ·

Nik Rahila Wan Ibrahim
nina - i pun nak ternangis jugak dgr citer you.. i can feel what she feels, really.. what a special woman!shaz - sakit sampai hujung kaki & otak is right! my crack memang sampai my kids memang muntahkan darah punya afterwards.. rasa nak terbaling baby masa dia latch tu menahan sakit.. the first 2 weeks is the hardest.. now getting better.. all the best to all of us.. may Allah give us strength to finish this!
January 26 at 4:06pm ·

Shazreen Zakaria
ila, i apply lansinoh..its an australian product..very good..here u can get it from mothercare
January 26 at 4:18pm ·

Shazreen Zakaria
if they become vampires, i hope they look like the Cullens hehehehe
January 26 at 4:20pm ·

Nik Rahila Wan Ibrahim
edward in particular..*sigh* but i have girls..! hehe
January 26 at 4:40pm ·

Shazreen Zakaria
the girl vampires pun kewl apa..
January 26 at 4:47pm ·

Shazreen Zakaria
btw ila, i have a lot of milk storage packets yg i x habis guna..u nak tak?plastic yg mcm aiskrim m'sia tuh
January 26 at 4:49pm ·

Nik Rahila Wan Ibrahim
hehe.. thanks shaz but stok i pun byk ni.. bab2 membeli i memang johan, pas tu habis ke tidak belum tentu.. huhu.. are you no longer pumping?
January 26 at 5:00pm ·

Puteri Isyatur Radhiyah
Ila, lagi satu nak heal the crack they say susu kita tu kita sapu dekat crack tu everytime. Lebih selalu lebih bagus. It worked for me.
January 26 at 10:18pm ·

Nik Rahila Wan Ibrahim
i did try that.. but so-so lah for me.. it took a while jugak to recover.. guess kena redah je lah.. thanks for the tip! :-)
January 27 at 8:55am ·

Shazreen Zakaria
no more pumping..d milk da adjust to my schedule....n wafeeq is already on solids so manyak senang la
January 28 at 6:57pm ·

Nik Rahila Wan Ibrahim
aiya manyak bagus la itu macamm.. how old is wafeeq already?
January 28 at 7:13pm ·

Shazreen Zakaria
he just turned 1 last friday..Alhamdulillah
January 29 at 2:08pm ·
Write a comment...

Alamak!

Two new things I did yesterday:
I started exercising again - 30 minutes cardio and 15 minutes toning..
and I ate oats and honey for dinner, instead of rice.

To my horror, my pumped milk was less than usual...! What gives..?

Alamak...!!!!

Breastfeeding again

My baby's 2 months old already.. and I'm well way on my breastfeeding journey again. I'm hopefully wiser this time around and determined to do it better. With Sarah, her first formula bottle came at 15 months. I was happy and very grateful, considering with Sufya I barely made it 30 days. This time around, with Syasya, maybe, just maybe, I could touch 2 years.

One single factor that I contribute this to - is the need to create your own support system. The Internet- the cyber experts & online breastfeeding mums and forums, for me- was mine, since I couldn't find real-life people who had a full time career and made it past their pantang days. I wasn't so lucky with Sufya, my firstborn, since the Internet was scarce then and my mum didn't really breastfed any of us and therefore couldn't understand what it took.

For Sarah, I armed myself with lots and lots of reading, and was able to hold myself well enough to fight off, well actually just smile off, all `well-meaning' advices and urges. You see, `well-meaning' does not neccesarily mean right. Times have changed, and how we raise our kids are probably a bit different than how we were raised.

With Syasya now, I've decided to put up a lot of pictures and info for friends who might be making this wonderful decision and also to keep myself motivated. Because there is one disease every pumping mother will get as time goes by and it's called M.A.L.A.S (Huhu..)

So here's for today (^_^)

I collected these 24 packs (7 oz each) within a little more than 2 weeks in February, and I keep them in Avent liners to save space. It's so beautiful to look at kan.. hehe.. But I must remind myself that my milk will not be this abundant as time goes by.. so I can't lose sight of that and must keep pumping.

Maybe this is a better way to arrange it?

They go in containers labelled by month, so I know which stock to finish first. They only have a shelf life of 3-4 months frozen, and I use only 1 pack a day. The rest would be fresh milk that I've pumped that day or the day before.

This would be ready for feeding. Just pop them in hot water for a few minutes and transfer them into my Breastflow bottle, and we're ready to go. My pump parts are not washed after every session, only once a day, washed and sterilized. Instead they go into the fridge too.

My Breastflow bottle. Its design is patented to discourage nipple confusion - something every breastfeeding mum fears. It helps baby to switch between mum's breast and bottle effortlessly.

My freezer.. the March container ready to receive stock (^_^)

Fish/chicken/meat will go to the bottom shelf. Here, you are looking at the day before pasar day.. ahaks

What I do FIRST every morning upon opening my eyes is go to freezer to check my stock. It's insane but EVERY breastfeeding mum knows what this feels like.

And I can tell you, it feels pretty damn good.

Lega

Oh my goodness.. I feel so relieved.

My wonderful supervisor, Dr. Supyan of UKM (some of you might remember him) has suggested that I take a semester off during my maternity leave to unwind and relax, and come back fresh in June to resume.

Why the hell didn't I think of that before?

I was feeling a soo down, thinking of all the work I need to catch up on, I even woke up every morning a heavy chest, knowing I have miles and miles to go before I even reach a milestone.

Now this leave would give me a chance to catch up!

Yay! I actually feel an overwhelming sense of hope and happiness, like the sun has decided to shine on me again. Syukur alhamdulillah! It was like I'm given a 2nd chance in life, and a death row has been lifted of me.

Thanks Dr. Supyan for a brilliant idea. Let me just sort out the paperwork for that, I really hope there aren't any glitches anywhere, and I will make you proud. I will treat the deferment as catch up time and my work will be top-notch, top of the game quality, you'll see!

Thank you, thank you, thank you!

God Bless You! Syukur!

I just hate it when..

I have a feeling someone is mad at me but I'm not sure why..